MARNIE Archives July 2015

This page holds archived editions of the MARNIE newspaper which is published every Monday. The Archive contains at least four-week-old issues, and links are clickable despite what the Editor's Notes of the paper editions say. In order to keep the reading content manageable, each month will have its own page.

Midgard's Alpha Realm News
International Edition
July 6th, 2015

Editor's Note:
Links can NOT be clicked but all lead to this server's wiki, and all photos but one are in the same Imgur album. Some of them are bigger files due to picture collages.

In Worldwide News:
Pride Event In Wyventon, page 9

In Regional News:
Northeast-Spawn Connection, page 28

In Local News:
Copyrights And Archives, page 40

Worldwide News

Autism List and Melon Check
(ar) On the page of the Autism Almanac, the autism scores of about fifty residents are listed and have confused Midgard Administration for some time. On July 2nd, God AlphaBernd gave a statement regarding the mechanics behind the list.
“Nether work does not count toward the score,” he asserted first off, then refuted the ongoing myth that rest periods (offline time) detract from said score.
God AlphaBernd explained that shown is the sum of a listed resident's changed blocks in Alpha's Realm only within the last 60 days, meaning that blocks changed before that will be subtracted from that sum.
On a related matter, Moderator July mentioned a while ago that the tool 'lb tb' also has a time limit of two months, so blocks changed before that will not show any results when melon-checked.
However, getting the message 'no results found' does not mean that the checked block does not belong to anyone. It might just have been placed a very long time ago, in which case chances are good that it belongs to a veteran. It is therefore advised to always ask around before taking any action to such blocks, to avoid accusations of griefing.

Pride Event In Wyventon
(wl) King Niller of Winterlyn recently announced the staging of a Pride Event in Wyventon, the capital of Winterlyn, to be held around the end of July or early August. Pamphlets proclaiming the occasion have been distributed in major locations around Alpha's Realm in so-called Pride Chests, and details can be looked up on the page in the Autism Almanac.
In an interview on June 30th, King Niller observed that, “We do nothing together on this server,” and recounted, “and then yesterday [God] Alpha[Bernd] was shooting gay fireworks. So I was like: let's have a pride then.”
The King further explained that, “It's not really like a normal pride, more like, let's have fun on this server. […] There will be mini-games, competitions […] with prizes. There will be an arena and the winner will win a beacon.” He suggested that people might be asked to either donate diamonds for such prizes, or pay an entry fee for it, but this is still under consideration and the decision will be posted on the Pride Event page in time.
The event's announcement has led to much controversy regarding its theme, and King Shakomatic of the Apostolic Kingdom of Breshik for one has stated that he will not attend, and his Kingdom “will be holding a celebration the same day” called “the feast day of the martyrs of Syrai.” He graciously stated that, “The Winterlyn pride people are allowed to come granted they honor the martyrs.”

Far Southern Settlement Calis
(ca) In the far southern snow regions, a Calisian outpost recently recovered from dire straits and developed into a strong settlement under the leadership of Superintendent Tablecat, who recently abdicated from his temporary role as Eyjan Hvíta's President in order to reconnect with the expedition he had long ago lost contact to. The settlement's has been named Calis, and its bleak chronicles can be read on Calis's page in the Autism Almanac.

New Moderator Appointed
(ar) On June 28th, God AlphaBernd approached Polish Chuck_Fiinley with “an offer for you you can't refuse” and promptly appointed him as moderator. When questioned due to his new abilities, Chuck_Fiinley replied, “Yes, Alpha hires sick people, and since I sometimes consider myself sick, well …” He can now be approached for support and judiciary. On the Staff Page of the Autism Almanac, the addition has not yet been documented.

Kriegstein's Duchies
(ks) During the past two weeks, King Sidmarcus of Siverny, also Monarch of Royaume de Kriegstein, afforded some land and titles to Tomoko Kuroki and Carluga. 1) Within his realm's territory, the Duchy of Aresia was established by newly-appointed Duke Tomoko, who doubles as Secretary-General for Royal Affairs and in turn gave his friend, now Duke Carluga, sovereignty over the Duchy of Orcaella. Both duchies have a nether rail connection to New Spawn.

Serial Killer on the Loose
(wl/ab) Last week, at least one serial killer left his mark on Alpha's Realm. In three cases of mass murder, no evidence of their identity could be uncovered except that they were apparently familiar with the target locations. The Kingdom of Winterlyn was hit twice and suffered the loss of all its prized horses and trained farmers in short succession. Only days later, the Apostolic Kingdom of Breshik too had all its horses murdered. Suspicions and accusations flew in all directions but failed to achieve any solution.
Neither livestock nor populations seem to be safe these days; please take precautions to safeguard your most valuable individuals.

CIS Intact
(ar) It has been decided that the Confederation of Independent States will not be dissolved after the June tensions. The organization remains with mostly Commonwealth members except for the newly added City-State of Siverny.

Believe Banner
(ts) For residents open to other beliefs than official religions or gay rights, BlackB of Taushahar created an 'I want to believe'-banner that may be ordered from him. It is shown at

Regional News

Decline of Eyjan Hvíta
(eh) On June 29th, President and Prime Minister Tablecat of Eyjan Hvíta officially announced his abdication from office. Since he was leaving to take up leadership of his own settlement Calis, Tablecat renounced citizenship in Eyjan Hvíta, leaving its current status as city-state in question. With a comatose resident (Moorglade) and its leader (Harcourtien) noted absent for months, Eyjan Hvíta should be considered an inactive settlement.

Northeast-Spawn Connection (ns) Many areas in and around the Northeastern Sea have become more easily accessible due to a new Nether rail connection with a switch-station that allows to choose any of four travel directions (or circle for fun). From New Spawn Netherhub, Rail #5 ('NEAR Transports', on the upper level, signposted) currently leads to the Wyventon (Confederation) Netherhub and the portals to Nouvelle Reims, the Duchy of Aresia and the Duchy of Orcaella. Its end point is Utgard Station, which is connected to Midgard Station. From there, the Valensiya Metro provides fast and safe travel to nearby islands. From Lauranya, further islands and the northern mainland are quickly reachable by boat.

Local News

Inauguration of Utgard Station
(ug) Since native guards and workers took the contract between Midgard Administration and Representatives of the Nether quite seriously, the construction of both Utgard Station and the rail connection to New Spawn could be completed in a matter of days.
On July 1st, the natives who had overseen and helped attended an inauguration party at Utgard Station with their families, congratulating the Midgard workers and themselves on a job well done and receiving praise from those who did not partake in the construction.
The celebration included a short journey through the portal to Midgard Station, where the natives took a fancy to the station's lava lighting. On the Nether side, free trial rides were offered, which the natives enjoyed heartily. One of the youngsters decided to practice for guard duty by accompanying our reporter in leading a horse from Wyventon, where King Niller of Winterlyn had amiably given him mare, through the Nether connection to Midgard.
The station and the party were very well received by the natives, who uttered regret only about the absence of Midgard merchants. Once Midgard Yews can join them in a safer environment, they would like to celebrate once more, and also invite residents from all around Alpha's Realm. Photos of the occasion can be viewed at

Griefer Warning
(mm/ug) Direct access to New Spawn brings the danger to be griefed to Midgard Municipality and its Utgard Station. Very shortly after the NEAR line was opened to the public, one such individual visited our town and left his fingerprints. Evidence against the griefer named Darkos has been collected and can be viewed at, and his minor offenses have been reported to Moderator Bikky as a precedent as the guilty party has not yet been available for questioning. In case of repetition, the incident will be treated as a theft of private property and, depending on severity, a request for reparation from and/or punishment of the thief will be addressed toward a moderator.

Copyrights And Archives
(mm) Recently, one of our readers kindly suggested to publish copies of copies of our newspaper, rather than just copies of the original, in order to secure copyrights and profit. After some lengthy debate about this certainly sound point, our editor came to the conclusion that from the time of its very creation, the MARNIE newspaper “has never been about profit.” Its sole purpose is to spread information about recent events to as many residents as wish to be informed, which is why its current price will never change.
To that end, Editor Jinxauthor_Mel also wishes to give explicit permission for anyone who purchased a copy of MARNIE at the Midgard store, or otherwise came to own one, to copy that book however often they see fit and keep or distribute those copies at any price they deem appropriate to any resident they can find who is willing or unknowing enough to pay that. For historical purposes, an archive has been established in the Autism Almanac that can be accessed via the 'Books' page at or via the Midgard page. The 'MARNIE Archives' will be grouped by month to keep the pages manageable, and updated weekly with the contents of four-week-old issues.

Municipal Registries
(mm) On July 3rd, Midgard Administration ordered the first official Yew census to help plan the building of required residences. In the process, several registry books were started. For the Citizen Registry, every Yew's name, occupation and address were recorded and thus determined that currently four of them do not yet have their own place to live.
In the Street Registry, occupied addresses are listed to afford an easy overview of available houses or plots free to build on.
Since four residents have perished from known causes during the past two months, those are listed in the Death Registry with the grave numbers on the future cemetery.

Midgard's Alpha Realm News
International Edition
July 13th, 2015

Editor's Note:
Links can NOT be clicked but mostly lead to this server's wiki, and all photos on Imgur are all in the same album. Some of them are bigger files due to picture collages.

In Worldwide News:
Library Projects, page 16

In Regional News:
Renewed Vigor in Skellie Farm, page 33

In Local News:
Zweiyurten Management, page 40

Worldwide News

'Competition' Failed
(ab) Due to an apparent lack of interest in the building competition proposed by King Shakomatic of the Apostolic Kingdom of Breshik, the completion of the dome on the Imperial Parliament in Nova Bydlograd turned into a contract by process of elimination. Since the only person who applied was King Sidmarcus01 of Siverny, he will likely be the one to design the new dome. However, no progress or finishing date has been announced since his participation, and for now the building is still missing its dome. The parliament building can be viewed at the coordinates

Pride's Carnival
(wl) After his first proposal led to much controversy among the residents of Alpha's Realm, King Niller of Winterlyn tentatively suggested turning the Pride Event into a Carnival instead. Compared to the uproar the original campaign caused, this adaptation was met with few and much more subdued reactions. While a carnival might certainly attract more residents and offend less, it seems the curiosity level was somewhat downgraded by the proposed change.

Suspicious 'Hacker' Attack
(ar) On June 6th, Resident Moonw41k was accused of griefing and invasion by Residents Claire and QuarteXSoija. During this event, Moonw41k also seemingly attacked Resident Monocle_s fatally several times.
However, a snapshot of the actual aggressor was uploaded to showing a named skeleton as the four-time killer, and who exactly named the hostile mob was not disclosed. It should be noted that, in order to be shot dead by a skeleton with an unenchanted bow in broad daylight where it will not move out of the shadow, even an unarmored resident would have to stand still for several shots.
With the photo, Resident Moonw41k was called a 'hacker'; whether this was done out of ignorance or with intent of slander could not be discerned. Resident Moonw41k escaped before authorities could be notified.

Spawn Complaints
(ns) When God AlphaBernd visited Alpha's Realm on July 9th, he was almost immediately showered with complaints about the cramped layout of New Spawn. He strictly forbade any demolishing of existing buildings there, even ones without purpose, but offered a compromise: If someone were to create a more open area on the wooded land north of the Marketplace (“across Putin Bridge”, it was described), God AlphaBernd would move the Spawn Position over there. The offer was mostly blindly rejected despite its merits, as the complainers apparently were more interested in demolishing 'trash' than creating space.

Library Projects
(ar) Within the last couple of weeks, a renewed interest in written books has stirred among Alpha's Realm residents. Several people have started, independently from each other so far, to collect books and plan libraries.
Prime Minister Salah of Umm Al Asufli is making great efforts to recover the lost literature of the Library of Al-Iskandariya, restoring the originals and selling copies to collectors. Moderator Tangaloa is one of those collectors and apparently already owns a private library, where he stores all worthwhile literature in safety, and for his eyes only (for now). He is asking people to donate books to keep them safe, or else sell them to him for he “can pay handsomely”.
In contrast, Duke Speermen of Skellie Farm has great plans to build a prestigious library in Skellsborough that will be accessible to the public, and mentioned intentions of founding a collaboration of sorts among enthusiastic book collectors, possibly an academic circle. This idea has yet to fully evolve, and potential partners need to be officially approached.
Chief Tsaryu of the Commons of Valensiya has contributed to some collections with the German book 'Svari' and mentioned considering writing more books. Duke Speermen offered to translate in order to have 'Svari' reach a broader audience.
Midgard Administration has longstanding plans to establish a bookstore within the station mall; however its very concept was meant to be a small and quaint island shop attracting few if any outside customers, and in its present layout it might not be able to offer all of the books that are currently being written in our world.

Breadbasket Settlement
(er) On July 6th, President Hinoarashi of the Republic of Battkhortostan informed his citizens Speaker BearMonger and Duke Tomoko Kuroki of a personal idea to create “a rustic agricultural settlement some time” that could serve as “a breadbasket for both Kriegstein and Battx.”
For the most outspokenly democratic nation in Alpha's Realm, the President quite brazenly suggested to “utilize Yew slavery,” but it should be considered that any Yew population might quite happily settle and farm in safety within the “gay little French rural town” that President Hinoarashi has in mind.
As different from the most modern city of Alpha's Realm, Hinoarashington, as the concept sounds, with the most experienced constructors of the Republic of Battkhortostan at work, the future town will certainly be integrated impeccably into the nation.

Umm Al Asufli's Sentinel Statue
(ua) On July 8th, Prime Minister Salah of Umm Al Asufli invited a Midgard reporter to his city-state to present the huge statue he recently finished working on. The sculpture depicts a steadfast and noble warrior, holding a lava scepter in his right hand and a golden dagger in his left hand, to bring light and safety to the land he is guarding.
Aptly, the warrior monument was named The Sentinel by its creator Salah. It was built using many rare and valuable materials, assembled into an awe-inspiring figure especially when you walk beneath it. The statue is therefore visited many times a day by citizens and tourists alike, and rather avoided by monsters at night.
Photos of the statue can be viewed at and

End of the War
(er/cw) The Commonwealth-Ender War officially came to an end on July 8th when King Shakomatic of the Apostolic Kingdom of Breshik publicly renounced all claims on Altschwabenland or the surrounding disputed area. With the Treaty of Somerset finally observed by all parties, President Hinoarashi of the Republic of Battkhortostan declared it in effect again, granting a peaceful state between both nations.

Regional News

Renewed Vigor in Skellie Farm
(sf/vy) After checking out the proposed colony mountain on the main continent, sought after for its closeness to other member nations of the Danikan Commonwealth, Duke Speermen of Skellie Farm decided to focus most of his attention on his original settlement. Now known as Southern Skellie Farm, its main town Skellsborough is growing handsomely, and prestigious future projects (like a great library and an overworld rail to Nova Bydlograd) have already been planned to attract more attention to the area.
Also to that end, Duke Speermen decided to get connected to the Valensiya Metro System, and Chief Tsaryu of the Commons of Valensiya responded quickly to the request by redesigning his planned network, in order to simplify the connection of both Skellie Farm and, at a later point, Eyjan Hvíta toward the “Financial Heart” of the Northeastern Islands, Lauranya.
The actual construction was finished within days, and the new line called 'Kassiopeia' is already in service between Skellsborough and the station Südwestkreuz which has been moved farther east. An updated map will be published after revision.

Breshik Claims 'Eastwatch'
(ab) On its newest map, viewable at, the Apostolic Kingdom of Breshik claims an area named 'Eastwatch' on the southeastern continent, apparently for military purposes. No details have been publicized except for the markings on this map, so it remains a mystery what is to be created in the area, or by whom, or even when or if at all.

Local News

Zweiyurten Management
(mm/sf) Before Duke Speermen settled in Skellie Farm, he started a tiny settlement in the eastern plains. The place was left abandoned, with a sign offering anyone with interest to take it. In an agreement with Skellie Farm, Midgard Municipality was afforded management over the place. It was named 'Zweiyurten' in keeping a provisory designation written on the Valensiya Metro map, and Chief Tsaryu has added a station at its location. Midgard Administration will use the area mainly for flower farming and refrain from mining or building in order to preserve the land as is.
Duke Speermen's offer still stands, and in the event that a new settler finds interest in the land, Midgard Administration will step back from its management position and cease using the plains for farming, unless an agreement can be reached with the new owner.

Midgard's Alpha Realm News
International Edition
July 20th, 2015

Editor's Note:
Links can NOT be clicked but mostly lead to this server's wiki, and all photos on Imgur are all in the same album. Some of them are bigger files due to picture collages.

In Worldwide News:
Post Box Opened, page 14

In Regional News:
Fortress Camelot2), page 38

In Local News:
Employment of the Mentally Challenged, page 46

Worldwide News

Witherwood Designs
(ww) Far in the south, a small settlement has been developed during the last few weeks. It was named Witherwood, though that might change in the future, and was created be the residents Zoythrus and Xpeh_wam. The settlement and its farms are entirely private property, including the two gold farms built there.
Main constructor Zoythrus shows quite a fondness for creepers, as several such decorations adorn the area and his store at New Spawn as well, as shown at
The gold farm which had originally caught the reporter's interest is one of two impressive nether portal cuboids that have been built separately due two differing opinions on outer designs. Photos of it can be seen at
Resident Zoythrus explained that his gold farm actually consists of two rows of portals above one another, and the collection mechanism is located nearly on bedrock level. The gain can sum up to “somewhere about ten stacks of nuggets per hour, if you stay in the right position,” so his construction is a rather profitable system for resting periods. He still has further plans to adorn the top and sides of his farm with a decorative cover so that it will better fit the settlement's style.
While the two huge farms are certainly eye-catching, Witherwood points with spacious and stylish architecture underground as well. Especially the huge storage hall located beneath the glass circle is certainly worth a visit if only to view its design, and the small village has been designed for safety, as can be seen at
On the desert half of the settlement, Resident Xpeh_wam has built a domed house, a kiln factory and a sorting mechanism for storage purposes. Resident Zoythrus is considering moving on his own to an Extreme Hills biome that he has already been eying, once he is satisfied with his work in his current settlement.

Statue Quarrels
(ns) The evening of June 18th saw a level of bored creativity and vexed retaliation never before witnessed on New Spawn. Photos of the incident have been compiled at and the following six files. Due to the extent of the incident, a more comprehensive coverage will be published in MARNIE's very first special edition, titled 'MARNIE sped#01', sold at Midgard Store's newspaper stand for the same price as the weekly paper.

Post Box Opened
(ns) During the debate last week regarding useless buildings on New Spawn, Midgard Administrator Jinxauthor_Mel received permission from God AlphaBernd to make use of the abandoned yellow cube, provided the already existing structure was not altered too much.
The building itself was originally designed by Veteran Resident Bremenbernd. Administrator Jinx was kindly warned by God AlphaBernd that the building's creator might not like the change once he returns. Should that become the case the building will be returned to its owner, of course.
Since the walls of the building proudly display the symbol of the German Post, the black post horn on yellow ground, it stood to reason to make use of the structure in that very way.
A roof was added to make it easily visible and identifiable on the map, see, and access to two lower levels was provided.
The newly named Post Box is supposed to be used as a central message and trading house. Anyone who wishes to create a 'mailbox' can go there and follow the instructions on the signs to create a donation chest. For residents who do not yet know what this is, a donation chest is one only its owner can take items out of, whereas anyone else can put items inside.
The system would allow residents to leave each other messages when one of them is offline, by putting a notebook ('book and quill') or a written book in the other's chest. The same way, trades can be continued or concluded even after one party left the game, by leaving the traded goods in the trade partner's chest.
Naturally, where there are mailboxes, there will also be spam. There will be people stuffing donation chests with single and mostly useless items, so it is advisable to regularly check and empty the chest, but especially right before it is supposed to be used for trading.

New Spawn Bombed
(ns) In a very delayed reaction to having his passenger plane removed from directly over the spawn point, Resident TheNerd96 detonated explosives at New Spawn on Wednesday.
According to Chief Tsaryu of the Commons of Valensiya, who happened to be in the area at the time, “TheNerd96 went ALLAHU ACKBAR with a few stacks of TNT. […] He said, 'Hey guys, I'm going to blow up Alpha's House,' and two seconds later BEEEEEEWM - I came out of the mall and literally everything was gone.”
Chief Tsaryu provided pictures of the damage which can be viewed at
New Spawn was swiftly repaired, and Resident TheNerd96 received a prison sentence for one month.

Artsy Addition to Marketplace
(ns) Resident Yagira, who has been hanging around the New Spawn Marketplace without apparent goal, has taken upon himself the decoration of a corner wall with pleasing results. After being pointed to the closed off area behind that wall, in the southeastern corner on the second level, he decided to set up his own shop there (where Resident Xepall's steam bar was supposed to be) and was well received by other residents.

Remembrance of a Friend
(wl) After being informed about the death of his good friend Sauerei, co-founder of the city of Wyventon, King Niller of Winterlyn has decided to create a memorial and cathedral in Winterlyn's capital, in memory of shared project plans. Photos of the cathedral can be viewed at as well as on the page in the Autism Almanac, along with further details. shows an overall view of Wyventon's greatest structures.
“I used a lot of stuff that Sauerei left me,” King Niller explained in an interview. “Austrobernd has been appointed as Bishop of Wyventon,” and beneath the cathedral “will be a museum where I am going to display Sauerei's stuff. […] With the monuments I have tried to build something in his honor since this was our project as friends. […] And by making it grand, people will remember him every time they pass by the signs.”
God AlphaBernd was asked about ways to safeguard the displayed items from griefing and indicated his approval and support of that precaution.

Forced Shop Removal in Mall
(ns) In yet another instance of violence this week, a bomb was detonated even inside the Marketplace. After being shown a lot “about to get removed from premises” by Chief Tsaryu of Valensiya, Resident Hostes decided to speed up that process by removing the store himself. With the help of Swamp Paladin Massolit of Novoblagomirsk who supplied the TNT, the abandoned store at the northwestern corner of the second level was blown up in short order.
Some of the merchants survived, and Resident Hostes lost no time in repairing the damage and redesigning the layout, displaying a rather shrewd sense of taste.

Regional News

Valensiya's New Stores
(vy/ns) Chief Tsaryu of the Commons of Valensiya recently remodeled his general store into a bookstore. While books are still being printed to be sold there in the near future, he relocated the general store to a more spacious lot on the southern side of the second level and opened a small café right next to it, and both sell prime Valensiyan goods. Those stores are already in business and receive good patronage, as does the small Coffee Corner outside of the mall that is “literally dirt cheap,” as Chief Tsaryu put it.
However, both the general store and café have been griefed repeatedly, forcing Chief Tsaryu to extensively reconstruct the entrance for guaranteed safety.

Fortress Camelot
(fc) Resident Hostes recently moved up to the northern coast of the Northeastern Sea and has apparently started the ambitious plan to create a star fort. A signpost named the location Fortress Camelot, though so far the only actual building was erected by Swamp Paladin Massolit of Novoblagomirsk.
The structure serves as both an embassy and church, and is in fact proudly declared as “the first paladinism church outside of Novoblagomirsk” on a sign near its entrance.
Fortress Camelot is part of the Commonwealth, as a banner and sign placed by High Commissioner Austrobernd of the Mandatory of New Badfacia states.

Local News

Utgard Stabilized
(ug) After the necessary precautions were taken, material gathered and fire-resistant workers secured, further stabilization of the Utgard Station could be undertaken. The station, which had so far been precariously upheld by the rail tube alone, is now balanced upon five pillars reaching all the way down to the ground beneath the lava lake. An additional pillar was added beneath the Portal Chamber, and two of the six pillars are accessible for maintenance work. This option was also chosen to allow for future extensions of Utgard beneath the station as well as above and around it.

ARA Trial Ended
(mm) With its eight copies sold, Editor Jinxauthor_Mel declared the trial period for the ARA paper as over. The offer to promote regions, ideas or trade offers in book form did not find any approval apart from the first time it was requested, so there will not be any further editions of the advertisement paper.

Employment of the Mentally Challenged
(mm) After repeated incidences, Midgard Administration learned that some of its Yew population occasionally display symptoms of Stress Amnesia. Notably the merchant Ned Newspaper, who works at the Midgard Store at New Spawn, tends to forget how to do business whenever he survives violent circumstances and witnesses the repair work. After some consideration, it has been decided to afford those mentally challenged residents equal employment rights and thus Ned will keep selling the MARNIE newspaper. Should he claim to be out of stock at any time, Midgard Administration asks our esteemed readers to show leniency and report this circumstance to Jinxauthor_Mel as soon as possible. (His mailbox in the Post Office may be used to do so in case of extended absence.) Ned will then be reminded about the prices he was meant to ask and continue his job in peace until the next repair work known as 'rollback' occurs.

Midgard's Alpha Realm News
Special Edition
Number 01

Editor's Note:
Links to all photos on Imgur are all in the same album. Some of them are bigger files due to picture collages.

The Statue Quarrels of New Spawn

(ns) The evening of July 18th in the year 2015 saw a level of bored creativity and vexed retaliation never before witnessed on New Spawn. This special edition will cover exclusively the events at New Spawn on that day.
High Commissioner Austrobernd of the Mandatory of New Badfacia, lamenting the lack of people to build with, decided to build a statue around New Spawn. As location he chose the empty roof of the entrance to Akarinka's station, and as a motive apparently his longtime superior first came to mind. A sign on the socket designated the statue as 'Shakomatic, Kaiser of Breshik'. (This is actually incorrect in several ways, as Shakomatic is the King of Breshik and used to be the 'Kaiser of the Commonwealth' until couped out of the position last month, incidentally by HC Austrobernd himself.)
As soon as the statue was finished, people came to inspect, investigate, climb, jump and generally have some fun. “I think it suits this shitty spawn well,” was all Lord Austrobernd commented about his project, and the first person to object to that opinion was Swamp Paladin Massolit of Novoblagomirsk.
With barely any delay, President Hinoarashi of the Republic of Ender joined the spectators. He later declared, “I only signed on because Bear wanted to knock down somebody's legos today,” revealing Speaker BearMonger to have been the one to alert him.
Within fifteen minutes after appearing on New Spawn, and without any official statement or even warning, President Hinoarashi gave the order to fire, and Speaker BearMonger launched a missile at the statue. Thankfully, the President had taken care to first see the area cleared and later revealed to even have warned a bystander silently to vacate the area, so no casualties were caused apart from the actual target, which has been captured on (Photo 28).
From the head of the still standing statue's ruins, Swamp Paladin Massolit of Novoblagomirsk spawned a veil of water without stated purpose. Undeterred, President Hinoarashi ordered Speaker BearMonger to fire a second missile, keeping the layer of water in mind. This time, HC Austrobernd stood ready on the statue's right arm and managed to disable the explosives by destroying the TNT, captured on Photo 29.
Since the missile could not finish its job, Duke Tomoko of Aresia decided to help out with some manual action. He placed several explosives on the ruins and ignited them, managing to blow himself up and President Hinoarashi off the statue's left arm, shown on Photo 30. The President survived thanks to formidable armor.
What little remained of the great statue's body, Duke Tomoko artfully set ablaze, caught on Photo 31. As if in answer to the statement, the skies released a load of water at that very moment. The shovel proudly survived all attacks; two of the adjacent buildings however were less lucky and got damaged by the nearby explosions, proven on Photo 32.
With their intended target destroyed, President Hinoarashi apparently got bored very quickly and therefore turned his attention toward the bystanders, demanding everyone to “convert to Islam.” Those who refused were attacked and killed, as happened to NoyaEleven and Jinxauthor_Mel while the former was asleep (afk) and the latter tried to repair collateral damage. Photo 33 recorded his 'reasoning'.
Maybe incited by his leader, Speaker BearMonger also took to direct attacks when his attempt to further demolish the ruins were impeded by HC Austrobernd. Unfortunately, he accidentally hit bystander Darynu, which led to a brief altercation. Both parties later discussed the misunderstanding and apologized to each other.
It was around this time that Battkhort citizens first claimed that the statue signified an annexation attempt of the neutral New Spawn area, something that was never declared nor even implied with signs on the side of its creator, nor asked about on the side of the attackers. The very assumption was made their basis for the statue attack, keeping in well with the proverb.
“I seek to liberate Spawn,” President Hinoarashi declared shortly after murdering two uninvolved bystanders, followed by a rather stereotypical, “You're either with us or you're with the terrorists.” In this case, the 'terrorists' peacefully built a statue, and the 'liberators' bombed it into oblivion.
About an hour after President Hinoarashi, Moderator P_P_A appeared on the scene and was promptly (and falsely) greeted by Duke Tomoko with the statement, “PPA you should have seen it, the Commonwealth tried to annex Spawn.” BearMonger declared the Batthkort reason for the first time in a coherent sentence, namely, “Your statue was an act of aggression toward free spawn,” directed at HC Austrobernd.
Disregarding the various comments from all sides in chat, Moderator P_P_A first rolled back the statue to its original appearance. When resident Hostes, affiliated with the Commonwealth, bombed the statue apparently just for the fun of it, he was the first to be banned for half a day. Moderator P_P_A once again restored the statue, only to have Duke Tomoko come up with the artsy idea to cover it with furnaces while not actually touching the structure.
Next, President Hinoarashi and Speaker BearMonger were banned for ten days with the reasons given, 'illegal pvp, killing people at spawn, griebing shit'. It was immediately rectified by several witnesses that BearMonger did not, in fact, engage in intended PvP, and his ban was lifted. He went on a mission to get his President unbanned too, but since President Hinoarashi's attacks were intentional, illegal per the rules, and actually unrelated to the statue, that ban was only reduced to three days.
When questioned by Swamp paladin Massolit as to why he was protecting the statue, Moderator P_P_A declared, “Because it obviously took a lot of effort to build,” and he would remove it only if the building's owner wants it gone upon returning. Since SP Massolit kept hitting the Moderator, he too received a ban for a couple minutes.
The next one to get banned was Duke Tomoko, this time by God AlphaBernd himself, with his placing of furnaces considered 'griefing'. The furnaces were removed, and God AlphaBernd stated that, “The statue looks good enough to be at spawn.”
To that, Duke Tomoko questioned, “If I build a statue giving Shako's statue the finger, it'd be ok too?” The idea was affirmed on the condition it looks well. “As long as it fits in I don't care what is built at Spawn,” God AlphaBernd stated.
Since Duke Tomoko was banned, in his stead Duke Carluga started building a “legitimate counter statue” on top of the mall, not touching its roof as precedented by the first statue. It was supposed to go with the above mentioned original idea but ended up primarily a copy, only differentiated by another skin and wielding a sword instead of a shovel.
A new sign on the original statue's socket now reads, 'raised by the thankful citizens of Breshik,' and oddly, Swamp Paladin Massolit who was the first one to complain about the statue is now the one designating it as 'Shakomatic' with a separate sign. The second statue is supposed to depict Duke Tomoko. Both can be seen on Photo 33 in a demonstration of power balance due to their very similarities.

Midgard's Alpha Realm News
International Edition
July 27th, 2015

Editor's Note:
Links can NOT be clicked but all photos on Imgur are all in the same album. Some of them are bigger files due to picture collages.

In Worldwide News:
Ghost Relocation, page 17

In Regional News:
Tipriya Village, page 44

In Local News:
Midgard Library, page 49

Worldwide News

Stress Amnesia
(ar) The last Rollback Repair on New Spawn confirmed a theory formerly discussed among employers of book vendors from various parts of Alpha's Realm. It had been observed that the recently discovered disorder termed 'Stress Amnesia' was not an ailment exclusive to Midgard merchants but seems to be an affliction of book vendors in general. Stress Amnesia Disorder should therefore be considered an occupational hazard rather than a mental disease. Any book vendor is at risk of forgetting his prices when subjected to a rollback procedure in his immediate working area, and will require reminding by his employer.

Mall Book Store
(ns) The first official bookstore in the New Spawn Marketplace was (after some delays) opened on July 21st. Having been a long-anticipated addition to the mall, it saw high patronage during its very first hour of business, with five customers right there on site and Moderator Tangaloa providing some fireworks. Fire was also set by Resident Monocle_s in a brief instance of vandalism but was doused quickly, and the offender ceased after he was discovered as the culprit.

Drug Apprehension
(ns) An anonymous source recently informed the press about rumors regarding 'a series of new drugs' possibly being offered on the black market. The source felt that since they 'have serious side effects', Alpha's Realm residents should be warned about this new danger.
Cautious inquiry with law enforcement received no results as their representatives denied all knowledge regarding any drugs. However, in following some officers' movements, it became evident that the police force of New Spawn seems to have its own suspicions. Currently, their unsubtle investigation is centered around this little corner shop our journalist managed to get some snapshots of while being chased away:
The shop is heavily guarded but has not yet been closed down, so it was possible to sneak in later and check the offers which are apparently causing police surveillance. The only one that might warrant such suspicions was a drink called Asbisthe.
Whether this shop is at all connected to the recent drug rumors is not confirmed at all, and even the police obviously hesitate to take action due to lack of actual proof.

Emporium Annex
(ns) On July 24th, Speaker BearMonger of the Republic of Ender requested “a nice emporium near spawn” be built for him “so I can sell bulk goods, as well as a place to store them and a place to dock a pipeline, eventually.”
Mall Manager Tomoko offered to have it attached to the previously open south side of the Marketplace, and the outer structure was soon erected.
After having been informed about the building's dimensions, Speaker BearMonger is “thinking about the layout now and what to sell” with “a combination of Yews and chests,” he explained his plans. “For example if you want to buy some stone, you can buy a stack from a Yew or put in payment to a chest and receive it a double chest at a time.”

Ghost Relocation
(ns) During the recent cold wave around New Spawn that even caused layers of snow on the streets, the ghost of a zombie child (that had been haunting the first buoy near the lighthouse) apparently decided to seek shelter inside, as seen at
The underage dead monster boy obviously felt attracted by the prominent erotic shop right at the entrance and has now taken residence in TheNerd96's store. Since the vendors there are currently out of stock, the ghost child seems to be waiting for the next shipment. This turn of events has stumped even the moderators, as evidenced by Moderator June placing a rather perplexed sign in front of the boy instead of removing him from the premises.

Safe Nether Rails
(ne) Resident Berezov recently decided to install glass blocks above some nether rails in order to decrease the spawning of Pigmen. While that in itself turned out a nice idea and worked fine, he was asked by Administrator Jinx of Midgard Municipality to remove the glass from NEAR Transport tubes, as those are also intended for horse and ass relocations. Unfortunately, even glass panes to not allow those animals to pass. Resident Berezov might try to improve other rails.

Police Rage
(ns) With increased violence and vandalism around New Spawn, the police force has entered a perpetual state of alarm regarding particular residents and often take to fatal action first before asking any questions. Known targets include Residents Monocle_s and Yagira, who both spend much time in that area.
Since it was suggested by an observer that a bad reputation might be the cause for the current situation, advantage was taken of Resident Santikaye's healing a Zombie at the mall. The fisherman was relocated to the storage building where trading could commence in order to restore reputation. Resident Monocle_s tried this with serious effort, however the result was marginal at best.

P_P_A's Return
(if) On July 19th, Moderator P_P_A returned to Alpha's Realm after a long period of absence, and was dragged right into the middle of the Statue Quarrels as a welcome-back present. “I've been making an effort to de-bernd myself over recent weeks/months,” the Moderator stated. “Been attending cons, local events of interest, meeting new people, etc. But it turns out that it's actually less entertaining than building shit in Minecraft and arguing about server politics, so here I am again.”
On July 23rd, he re-visited the iron farm for the first time and found the collection chamber he used to know demolished. Moderator P_P_A immediately banned Lolibernd, who had caused that destruction on June 9th, and was then informed by several residents that the iron farm was working despite that sabotage due to repair work done by the Republic of Ender's ERAID service.
After investigating the underground chamber, the Moderator was shown the new collection point.
He considered repairing the “old room that loli griebed” but decided to leave it when concerns were raised that it might interfere with the repair work. Lolibernd was unbanned, though it seems unlikely that he would even learn or care about being banned.

Kriegstein Roads
(ks) After the boundaries of the duchies and territories of Kriegstein have been established and mapped, it was decided by General Secretary Tomoko Kuroki that a better infrastructure system was needed to connect these areas.
Road construction commenced on July 24th as a collaboration of Duke Carluga of the Duchy of Orcaella and Administrator Jinx of Midgard Municipality. The material required for the task was provided by the Republic of Ender's ERAID service, who produced two double chests of smoothstone for the project. Most of the roads have been finished and are already in service thanks to Duke Carluga working overtime, and Sidonia will be connected soon as well.

Jumping Fun
(ns) Not very far from New Spawn, if one follows the new road toward Slavia Confederation northeast, Residents Csecs and Espriim02 have built the highest bungee platform in Alpha's Realm during the second week of July.
It was created entirely for the fun of jumping and has caused many deaths due to trial and error when testing the perfect distance.
If visitors wish to try for themselves, please keep in mind that the platform is entirely private property and any change on it will be considered griefing. Brave jumpers should also know that the platform is set at level Y256 where a home point cannot be set. It is advisable to set a home at the ground before climbing. When jumping, you have to hit a hole straight down where a slime block on Level Y23 will bounce you back to the surface. Step forward then, there will not be a second chance nor a way back to the up if you miss it. With some care though, one can have much fun jumping and bouncing.

When Tangas Fly
(ns) In a very special event, Moderator Tangaloa brought some trained astronaut pigs to New Spawn on July 21st and invited residents to “get on”. The first to do so was Resident Monocle_s who promptly was taken into the air while riding the pig. Upon a fatal landing he earned the achievement 'When Pigs Fly'; this inspired other residents to also ride a pig. A few pictures of this can be viewed at Our reporter earned the achievement as well.

Wither Summons
(ns) In a display of unprecedented stupidity, Resident Monocle_s tried to summon a Wither at New Spawn, as witnessed at Thankfully, the creature did not adhere to the summons.
Incidentally, Moderator Tangaloa who was present at that time had actually condoned the test and later slayed Resident Monocle_s not for trying to spawn a wither but over a dispute regarding wither skulls.

Regional News

Eyjan Hvíta Given Up
(eh) Despite President Harcourtien's return to Alpha's Realm for some time, the settlement Eyjan Hvíta will not be revived. “I don't want to live in Eyjan Hvíta anymore,” the President declared and announced his moving to a location a long way farther south, near the World Border. He gave no reasons for the decision that it leaves Eyjan Hvíta without any residents.

New Settler in Zweiyurten
(zy) On July 21st, new resident Mad_Hodman took an interest in Zweiyurten and decided to settle there. Midgard Municipality therefore steps back from management of the area in favor of trade agreements instead.

Tipriya Village
(tp) On the small Valensiyan island Tipriya, a cozy fishing village with the same name has been established by Chief Tsaryu. “It's really a rural place here,” he stated, with “typical Valensiyan architecture from 100 years ago.”
Some photos are shown at, and more will later be shown on the Valensiyan page in the Autism Almanac, particularly of the majestic Valensiyan birches growing on the island.

Local News

Loyal Mourner
(mm) During road construction work in Kriegstein, a wild horse was discovered trapped at a shore. It was later freed and tamed by one worker who decided to ride the horse home via the nether. When he did not arrive home at the arranged time, a search team was sent to meet him. All they found was the brave white horse, patiently waiting in one of the rail tubes beside the remains of his rider. Examination later revealed that the worker had stupidly suffocated himself in a ceiling by trying to ride inside the tube. The horse was guided to Midgard Municipality and named Loyal Mourner in remembrance of his behavior during that trying incident.

Midgard Library
(mm) Now that several works of literature have been acquired and the issues of the MARNIE newspaper grow in number, Midgard Administration has gathered the funds to finally comply to our population's longtime-request of having a library. It was built on the quiet upper level of the Station Mall, only topped by the managements offices. Here, many rows of bookshelves cater to anyone's taste, and the reading and study room provides seating for about thirty people at a time.

This issue ends the July 2015 page of the MARNIE Archives. The next issue will be posted on the August 2015 page.

Tomoko later clarified, “It wasn't Sid who gave us land, but Shako and Niller under treaties. […] I negotiated for the land and gave it to myself, but yeah, Sid's still king of it.”
name corrected for archive version
  • books/ma_15_07.txt
  • Last modified: 2020/11/08 04:02
  • (external edit)