MARNIE Archives December 2015

This page holds archived editions of the MARNIE newspaper which is published every Monday. The Archive contains at least four-week-old issues, and links are clickable despite what the Editor's Notes of the paper editions say. In order to keep the reading content manageable, each month will have its own page.

Midgard's Alpha Realm News
International Edition
December 7th, 2015

Editor's Note:
Pictures can be viewed at https://dev-urandom.eu/_media/books:newspaper_pictures:???.png when exchanging '???' with the photo number given in the articles. Other links lead to this server's wiki.

In Worldwide News:
Aestland's Return, page 21

In Regional News:
Quiet Brazilians, page 40

In Local News: The Yagira Affair, page 44

Worldwide News

Spawn River Collaboration
(ns) During the last week of November, Resident Nick4629 started to build a boardwalk along the eastern riverbank of the river west of New Spawn. He started in the south and worked his way north, using an intricate design that also prevents swimmers to climb up from the water.
From the north, after having established the new boathouse named the Innsmouth Shack on November 30th, Resident Dora worked southward from there, mostly successfully trying to emulate his countryman's design.
On the first of December, Duke June of the United Duchy of the Two Sorras requested, “Someone please rebuild the western spawn bridge. It's too low.” For the time being, he placed a sign on each side warning about inevitable head bumps.
Following the request, the next day Administrator Jinxauthor_Mel of Midgard Municipality elevated and stabilized the bridge, naming it Former Headbump Bridge in honor of both the original river crossing and Duke June's appeal to improvement. The boardwalk, which had not yet reached the bridge area, was extended, keeping with the designer's intricate details, and the bridge itself was constructed by blending the styles of the spawn grid and boardwalk together.
After the bridge was declared finished, Master Paladin Massolit of the Tsardom of Solntze-Grad widened the riverbed, enabling boats to maneuver the bend around the bridge support more easily.

Back on the Island
(up) On December 1st, Stadtholder Harcourtien of Den Faag notified the press that he had bought back the southern island from Duke Tomoko Kuroki of the Duchy of Sidonia.
He stated he plans to continue to build “something” in the western flower fields of the Republic of the United Provinces of the Netherlands, but might also create a second version of Eyjan Hvíta on the southern island. He has already removed the unfinished castle frame, and placed squares.

Nerd Killing
(ns) Shortly after rejoining the Federation of Aestland, some of its citizens killed Resident TheNerd96 around New Spawn and looted his death chest. When charged, Resident Deivis stated that Nerd had started by shooting arrows at them, confirmed by his countrymen and known to happen rather regularly. Even God AlphaBernd, who observed the ensuing discussions, noted that, “Well, we all killed Nerd at some point …” He convinced them to just return the looted items.

The Tsardom of Solntze-Grad
(sg) Having gathered five more citizens, Master Paladin Massolit of Solntze-Grad petitioned to found a nation by combining his territory with the neighboring previous Kriegsteinian duchy named 'Sidonia'. As that area remained unclaimed so far, permission for establishment of the new tsardom was given. The Master Paladin has not yet registered his new nation officially.

Suntopia's Newbie Package and Guide
(st) On November 29th, Baron CorruptedPants of the Barony of Suntopia embarked on a project aimed at the influx of new residents, especially completely inexperienced ones without a prior acquaintance in our realm.
Having thought up the idea of presenting each with one mule bearing a survivalkt to get them on the way and help them during the first days, he concluded that a guidebook was in order as well. While it proofed difficult to keep the in-game books up to date, the Baron continually improves the content which can also be found on the page https://dev-urandom.eu/talk:settlements:suntopia in the Autism Almanac.
Several players have already accepted the help and profited from the offer.

Multiple Identity Disorder Revealed
(ar) Regarding the near wither attack on New Spawn last week (see previous issue), Moderator GlitchyBat expressed some suspicions and asked co-Moderator July to do a background check on the culprit Zirael. It was thus discovered that Zirael, the reportedly 'robbed' Resident Mimokrokodil and the battle-versed Resident AdamJensen are all one and the same person. To date, neither personality has commented on the discovery.

Aestland's Return
(ae) Last Tuesday had the founder of Aestland return to his island. He came back to Alpha Realm after half a year of absence and gave the name 'Justasboi' for himself. He remembered his home but not how to get there, and accepted the offer of guidance for himself and a friend he'd brought along.
After a trek through the nether and some harrowing boating accidents on high seas due to inexperience, the three travelers made their way to the linked island. Only upon seeing it did the guide recognize it as Aestland, as the one trying to get there had not given a name, and remembered that there should be a portal even on the island itself.
The returnee agreed and found it at once, well-hidden as it is, as well as his former residence. Upon scrutinizing the chests in his home, the returnee remembered his real name and explained that he had been suffering from partial amnesia due to a network complication. Now that he was home though, he could fully return to his former self: Baltman, the founder of Aestland.
Upon the confirmation of his identity, Resident Baltman was informed about the recent invasion and annexation by the Holy Danikan Commonwealth. His immediate reaction was, “Nonsense, I'm the king of Aestland, I'll restore it.” Self-declared King Baltman was advised to seek independence once more by bringing the matter up to the Commonwealth's Reichsrat. When warned about possible opposition from King Shakomatic, who has been known to forbid once joined territories from leaving, King Baltman stated confidently, “Don't worry, I'll fuck his shit.”
When asked about his reason for returning, he replied, “I wanted to make Aestland great again.” Within a short time, he invited more new residents to his island and changed the 'duchy' back to the Federation of Aestland on the page https://dev-urandom.eu/nations:federation_of_aestland in the Autism Almanac.
When told of the re-establishment of Aestland, both Kaiser P_P_A of the Holy Danikan Commonwealth and King Shakomatic of the Apostolic Kingdom of Breshik “guaranteed” that the secession would be approved if properly petitioned for.
A minute later, King Baltman declared, “Kind sirs, I humbly request the independence of our federation so we could start cleansing the Christians with fire.”
King Shakomatic's immediate response was, “Okay, I am voting against,” and that Breshik would only “support independence if Aestland promises religious tolerance.” Since King Baltman took an outspoken stance against Christians, Kaiser P_P_A suggested to grant independence, give them some time, “and then we crusade them.”
To date, the bill brought up in the Reichsrat is still pending.

Large Scale Cooperation
(ns/pv) During the past week, Trader Flakese of Samerkand started building a racetrack “in order to make fat stacks off of bet hedging” east of New Spawn. It is intended to be of use to many residents and accordingly, he invited other residents to donate and help out. With the help of Baron CorruptedPants of the Barony of Suntopia and Residents CrazyCircus, Dora, Litvin and Yeti30, the Pony Valley Racetrack was finished on December 6th.

Triple Alliance
(ex) The recently flattened area that was once supposed to become Aresea's proud capital Arianapolis has been renamed to Tollan and received another chance at capital status. This time, the land it is to reign is called Ēxcān Tlahtōlōyān, a governorship combining three city-states under the united leadership of Tlatoanis Tomoko, Refyr and Opti.
In order to ease travel to the distant desert, Tlatoani Tomoko commissioned Midgard Municipality to extend a NEAR Transports line from the New Spawn Netherhub to Tollan. The line is operational as of this week's Monday, and assistants for mining and constructing could be attracted more easily.

Literal Highway
(ar) On November 29th, Resident Dmigis broached the subject of creating an “elevated road” from Samarkand to his hometown Chernolesovsk. Splitting from the Kurwa Highway right beyond Samarkand, the road would cross many territories. As such, Resident Dmigis was advised against the entirely elevated design, even while he received encouragement to pave the road itself. While parts of it are slightly heightened depending on the terrain, he was able to stick to the ground for most of it, receiving assistance and approval from Creator Tangaloa of Elkkuton.

Regional News

Quiet Brazilians
(bc/nb) Most of the Brazilian settlers have left the realm during the past week. While occasionally visitors arrive, few seem interested in staying longer, leaving only a handful regulars who build mostly on their own in otherwise abandoned settlements.
Brazilian Resident Mad_Hodman, who is also back, therefore decided to remain in Zweiyurten for now.

Local News

Efforts Elsewhere
(mm) Last week, Midgard Administration decided to accept two requests regarding employment outside of our settlement. In Nova Bydlograd, interior designers were given free rein in furnishing and decorating various halls and chambers of the monastery attached to the Basilica of St. Joseph. For a requested nether project, Tlatoani Tomoko of Ēxcān Tlahtōlōyān even offered payment which was gratefully accepted by Midgard's leadership.

The Yagira Affair
(mm) Late on December 6th, 2015, Resident Yagira visited Midgard Municipality in order to secretly test a plugin bug exploit he discovered, on chests he had already raided once before. During his time on the island, two villagers vanished from the Administration Residence. When this was included in charges of hacking and theft, and he was banned for one day because he would not leave the island, he angrily used a ban evasion and returned in the disguise of NoIDeaWa.
This time, he was caught in flagrante killing four more live-in merchants, and killed by Intern Nitu, who has before shown great dedication in defending the populace from hostiles. When the charges were brought to God AlphaBernd, a one week prison sentence was issued for the witnessed quadruple murder. Resident Yagira accepted the punishment, and animosity could be laid to rest.
As a result of his bravery, Intern Nitu has been granted the position of Constable with full control over the security guards. His duties will include protecting and defending the populace and visitors, from native hostiles and aggressive intruders, installing security equipment in sensitive areas and consulting with Architect Mel on building safeguards.

Newer issues are not yet archived but can still be bought at the New Spawn Book Store.