The Coronation Heist

The Kreigstein Coronation Heist
Dates 9-2-14
LocationNouvelle Kriegstein
Result Ender obtains Crown
Belligerents
Flag Ender Republic
Kingdom of Kriegstein
Leaders and Commanders
Flag Glitchy Sidmarcus01
Strength
1 Lots of spectators
Losses
A few minutes Crown

The Background

Kriegstein announced a Coronation Ceremony on Sunday the 9th of February. Little did the crownee, Sidmund Marcus the First, know history tends to repeats itself.

The Ceremony

The Pope used preist-like teleportation powers to warp attendants to the ceremony. They all stood and watched (as Kreigstein cannot afford chairs) and begun the music. Pope Rosendiana Jones spoke words of blessing and threw the crown on the ground and Sid absorbed it.

The Kreigstein Pool Party

After the crown was bestowed (along with some stick or something) Sid, Pope Rosen, and the attendees left the church to have a pool party. Other attendees wandered around town a bit. Rosen flew around like a helicoptor casually showing off his ability to levitate to the bunch of people.

Everyone kinda wandered around, unconcerned of the mysterious figure in a blue hood was walking around.

The Heist

After some splashing around in the pool of holy water, Sid hopped out and went towards the church to get a towel, but didn't notice the blue hooded figure sneak up behind him and jabbed him between the armor pieces.

[Sidmarcus01 was slain by GlitchyBat]

(12:51:40 PM) houdini: [G] Sidmarcus01: FUG
(12:51:41 PM) houdini: [G] Rosenmann: o kurwa
(12:51:43 PM) houdini: [G] GlitchyBat: HAIL ENDER
(12:51:52 PM) houdini: [G] Sidmarcus01: Muh crown
(12:51:55 PM) houdini: [G] Sidmarcus01: Muh royal scepter
(12:52:09 PM) houdini: [G] Ralxtew: ;_;

The blue hooded assassin, revealed to be none other than Glitchy, swiftly grabbed the Crown from Sid's unconscious body and warped home. Unfortunately for him, he was unaware a sceptor was also present, but was probably a stick or something so who cares.

A Series of Unfortunate Events

After warping home with the magic of Ender Dragon's love, Glitchy typically rubberbanded because he has shitty USA internet. He dropped the crown which Pope Rosen, who followed Glitchy's teleportation trace and probably has superior internet, picked up. Glitchy, being schizophrenic from the last time a mod got involved in politically motivated attacks, attacked the Pope and took back the crown.

[Rosenmann teleports to GlitchyBat]
[Rosenmann was slain by GlitchyBat]
(12:52:21 PM) houdini: [G] GlitchyBat: NO STEALING STOLEN CROWN
[Rosenmann bans Glitchy forever for the reason of 15]

Glitchy immediately started crying in IRC like Togepi from the older Pokemon anime episodes.

(12:52:28 PM) houdini: [G] Rosenmann: oops
(12:52:35 PM) houdini: [G] P_P_A: I have you some spruce saplings
(12:52:38 PM) houdini: [G] P_P_A: don't have dark oak ones
(12:52:42 PM) houdini: [G] P_P_A: *gave
(12:52:45 PM) houdini: [G] Telendil: wher is it?
(12:52:48 PM) GlitchyBat: MODABUZE
(12:52:53 PM) houdini: [G] P_P_A: 32 to be exact, along with the dirt
(12:52:58 PM) Rosenmann: I will lift a ban soon
(12:53:07 PM) houdini: [G] P_P_A: it's a permaban
(12:53:07 PM) Rosenmann: I am unpolitical
(12:53:12 PM) houdini: [G] Telendil: gotta go
(12:53:17 PM) houdini: [G] Telendil: cya]
(12:53:17 PM) Rosenmann: how do i tempban xD
(12:53:18 PM) houdini: [G] P_P_A: >Reason: 15
(12:53:19 PM) houdini: [G] Sidmarcus01: Ok Cya
(12:53:21 PM) houdini: [G] Telendil left the Server
(12:53:23 PM) houdini: [G] P_P_A: you put the number AFTER the reason
(12:53:27 PM) houdini: [G] Rosenmann: oooh
(12:53:30 PM) houdini: [G] Rosenmann: i forgot

Glitchy was then unbanned from his 15-minute permaban in about 5 minutes. Glitchy logged on and lead Rosen to his death chest, making ammends and clearly stating that Ender does not have any means of aggression to apolitical popes.

Reactions

I like this song - t. Blue hooded figure

Complete Log

  • battles/coronationheist.txt
  • Last modified: 2020/11/08 04:02
  • (external edit)